Why seeing ghosts is another unfortunate sign of our troubled times

Are you experiencing more ghosting than usual?

I don't mean paranormal phenomena; I'm talking about people who stop responding to you for no apparent reason.

In the business world, this practice can raise its head when someone contacts you with an invitation or a request for a quote. You answer them and get....crickets. Sound familiar?

Forbes reports that on the dating scene, ghosting has reached epic proportions. A US poll showed 76% of respondents had either ghosted or been ghosted in the context of dating.

But back to business. I'm noticing an increase in silence as a go-to response from many people.

While it's frustrating, I'm trying to view it through a lens of compassion. Cost of living pressures, staff turnover, world uncertainty - these have all served to make us collectively more self-absorbed.

In many cases, I believe people are so caught up in their own stresses they're incapable of managing their time and are simply not noticing the inconvenience they're causing others.

If you're tempted to ghost someone (and I'm continually reminding myself of this too), consider the impact it could have on your credibility and reputation. It can seem like an easy way out, but there are downsides:

1. Ghosting demonstrates a lack of reliability. In their model The Trust Equation, Maister, Green and Galford pinpoint reliability as one of the four keys to measuring trust. You can be highly qualified and popular, but if others think you’re unreliable, they won’t trust you. A person who ghosts sends an “I’m not dependable” message.

2. Ghosting shows a lack of courage. A ghoster is practising avoidance; usually trying to get out of an uncomfortable conversation. To build credibility in any situation, especially if you have to let someone else down, be proactive and say it how it is. A polite no clears the air. A non-answer reflects poorly on the ghoster and their reputation.

3. Ghosting is disrespectful. A person who chooses to disappear into thin air is inconsiderate of other people’s time and stress levels. Humans crave respect. We generally also prefer to receive bad news over being left dangling.

In our troubled world, we need clear and credible communication. If we each look at our own behaviour we can make a difference, one ghost at a time.